Tag Archives: husbands

Strong Men

It used to be men were strong and women were gentle and that was just the way of it. But now women are strong and men are soft and if you watch any show on television, you’ll soon learn that men are wimpy. Spineless. Weak.

Except they’re not.

At all.

They are still strong and when we remember that, and treat them like we remember that, they’ll show us just how strong they really are.

And when we go one step further, and remember what strength really means, what being strong looks like, we’ll see a lot more strength in our men.

Strength isn’t arrogantly flashing a college degree or a tricked out Cadillac Escalade or fancy jewelry or fancy words while you forget to care for the people the Bible tells us to care for.

Strength isn’t flaunting sparkly clothes and surrounding yourself with shiny happy people while you ignore the undesirables of the world.

Strength isn’t joking about your inadequacy or making yourself a bumbling sitcom idiot.

Strength isn’t beating your chest and lording it over the females in your life that you are a man.

Strength isn’t raising your strong male hand to any creature weaker than you.

Strength is protecting your woman and your children with the muscles God gave you. The ones in your arms and the ones in your mind.

Strength is humbly pouring into a congregation of people for over forty years with the hope of bringing a community to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.

Strength is remembering where you came from and remembering where you are going and trying to bring along as many as you can, no matter where they happen to be now.

Strength is seeing something ugly but loving it anyway.

Strength is telling your wife to enjoy the sermon while you sit with the sick child, even though you rarely get to sit in on classes at church because you’re always so busy serving at church.

Strength is letting the tears of joy fall free when you are reunited with your church family after missing Easter service and you choke up but keep talking anyway as you bring them all before the Throne with your words.

Strength is using what God gave you, practicing your skills and becoming a self-taught professional who uses his fame to show the world what it means to love your Savior and your family above worldly wealth and riches.

Strength is teaching the boys of this nation how to be gentlemen, how to treat girls, how to shake hands, how to put others first, and how to open doors. How to be a man of strength just like you.

Strength is taking your arms and stretching them wide, wide enough to circle the earth, and letting people who hate you hammer iron spikes right on through. Strength is not wanting to do that part, but loving enough to do it anyway.

He was strong because God asked Him to be.

And God asks our men to do that too.

And if we let them, they’ll do it. They’ll show us their strength.

They’ll show us all the gentleness and tenderness and sacrifice and selflessness and love they keep stored under those big muscles in their arms and right underneath their broad backs and right there under their ribs where their heart pumps loud and steady for all those they love.

When we quit flexing our hate-them feminism muscles and start remembering the treasure we are…as strong women…as gentle women…as soft women…as cherished women…as His women…

…we’ll see it.

We’ll see their strength.

And then we’ll see them.

 It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure.  2 Samuel 22:33

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Space 22

Children yelling joyfully

as mothers prepare packs for a hike.

Sausage sizzling on our campfire,

sweet aroma twisted

with the musty scent of camp smoke.

Wild roses filling the neck of our beer bottle,

her barbs still lodged in my thumbs.

Quiet, you’ll come back soon

and we’ll have breakfast…

…together.

My People

It’s rare for him to lie down.

Especially in the winter.

It was our fault naturally. We couldn’t provide a good enough place for him to live. We had no idea what we were doing. If we were better at this, he’d be lying down resting and cozy all the time. Just like on the movies. But, we were inadequate and couldn’t provide him a place to be restful and cozy so therefore, he’d just always be cold.

And standing. Swaying on his feet at naptime rather than lying down for a full rest.

It was different today though.

Today when I pulled in the driveway, he was down. Not quite flat but curled up, cozy. I stopped the truck to survey. Was he hurt? Had he injured himself? Why was he down? He never lies down…

“Gracie have you seen Beau lay down recently?”

She knows his habits well.

“No, not really. Except for a couple weeks ago.”

What had happened a couple weeks ago?

“I put Charlotte in with him for the day.”

There I had it. Today, circling him, fussing over him, were his loved ones. Close by, within reach and keeping him company.

He wasn’t hurt. He wasn’t sick. He was simply comfortable in the presence of those who knew him best. He was among them and this allowed him to be completely content and relaxed enough to lie down.

He was happy. He was at ease. He was 100% himself.

He was with his people.

Er, his mares.

We learned today, our Beau, our sweet and mellow boy pony, is most at ease when he has his friends right next to him. It’s not a matter of mating, he’s gelded. But they are like him and they like him. They all know one another. And in their company, he is completely relaxed.

He is himself when he is with them.

He is loved.

And he is accepted.

They are his people.

So when I answer the phone and it’s my husband and he wants to know where we’re at, I tell him. We’re at the grocery store.

Just pulling in, I’ll call you back when I finish okay?

As I finish up, I remember to call him and dial as I pull out, heading toward my next errand.

“I thought you were at the Safeway.”

It’d just been a short stop, I explained. How was your day?

“Oh. Well, I’m here in the parking lot. I just thought I’d drop in and see you guys on my way back to the office.”

I’m miles down the road by now. The store I’m heading to closes in an hour. It’s my last stop of the day.

Why didn’t you tell me?

I’m frustrated, wishing I could’ve seen him.

I didn’t know. You need to communicate these things to me. We would’ve stayed if we would’ve known. How come you just didn’t tell me?

He didn’t think of it. We were at the store, he was just going to stop in for a minute. Just to see us. Give us a hug. Say hi.

Irritation fills the cab of my truck.

“Well, it’s okay. I’ll see you tonight.”

I scolded him a bit.

He had to get back to work.

The I love yous and see you tonights fall flat.

And as I drive, it hit me.

He just wanted to be cozy for a minute.

Wanted to take a moment out of the drain of the work day and be with the ones who love him most. To soak up the feeling of being loved… being accepted…and to let it refresh him for the rest of his day. He wanted to curl his spirit right up for a minute and be relaxed, known…

…himself.

He just wanted to be with his people.

There are people that we know so well, they are only their very true self when they are with us.

And what about our Lord? Doesn’t God know us just like that? Even better than that?

Not even a sparrow, worth only half a penny, can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows. Matthew 10:29-31

We can curl up and be cozy in that kind of being known.

We are known.

I am known.

We are His people.

Our farrier told us a horse doesn’t spend a lot of time on the ground in winter. He said when you see a horse lying down for a nap, you can bet that horse is completely relaxed and comfortable.

That was our pony today, curled up right in the middle of the hay pile and his two little girlfriends. He was so comfortable, his big little body was plunked right down, at feed time even, and he let his horsey lips tickle the snowy ground while his big brown eyelids drooped. He was sheer comfort. He was perfect content. He was himself. He was whole.

It’s not our inadequacy that keeps him from lying down. It’s not our lack of a perfectly sized heated facility. It’s not our lack of horsemanship that keeps him on his feet come naptime.

He just needs to be with those who know him best.

I call my husband back, tell him I’m sorry I forgot to call him earlier.

I’ve removed all irritation from my voice.

I was too rushed. I really would’ve loved to have seen him.

“It’s okay. I should’ve let you know. I guess I just wanted to see you guys.”

Over the cell we patch it up.

The I love you is sincere, all shortness is gone.

I’m sorry I scolded you, I tell him.

“It’s okay babe.”

My big strong husband forgives me, assures me he’s not upset.

Says he should’ve told me he was heading our way, coming to where we were.

He just didn’t think of it.

He was just going to stop in for a minute.

He just wanted to see his people.

 

God sets the lonely In families…Psalm 68:6

DECEMBER 2013 030

© Cassandra Rankin, This Crazy Little Farm